On Tuesday January 10th, my mother called in the evening to tell me that she had visited nan in hospital. She wasn't responding. Thus in a coma. Her vital signs were abnormal, but she looked comfortable according to my mum.
I started to think that this is it. She only has 24 to 48 hours to live. I called mum and told her to ring her brother and tell him that she's deteriorated. She did so and left a message on his answering machine.
I went to bed around midnight and slept quite well. I awoke around 7-30 8 o'clock suddenly. As awake as anything, I got up and sent an sms straight away to mum saying, "Any news?"
She responded about 20 minutes later saying, "No, iv'e heard nothing, Im getting ready to go to the hospital now."
I got off the phone quite puzzled and thought, Wow! Nan is so strong. I cant believe mum hasnt heard anything.
So i had my piping hot coffee and started to map out in my mind the things i had to do for the day.One was a qiuck study over some nursing notes as i had a job interview at 11am.
I plodded along and the phone rang. I though this is it. This is the call from mum. Fair enough, my mobile displayed Mum. I answered and she said,"Love i just got the call, she's gone, she's just passed away." I responded with, "Are you ok, Are you going down to see her?" Mum said, "You wouldn't believe it, I was just grabbing my bag to go and drive to the hospital."
I said, "Mum if you see her, dont be frightened, talk to her, tell her that we all love her, that i love her, say what you wish."
She was crying, and then i started. The call ended with, "Mum let me know how you go, and dont be scared to see her." Mum sobbed with an "Ok love," and said she would call me later. I cried soooo much. I cried even though i knew she was going to die. I cried that i will never ever speak to or see her again. All these thoughts threw me into a blubbering mess! I finally got my self together and spoke to a friend. I felt better, thinking shit, i have a job interview in an hour.
I flooded myself with positive thoughts, and wanted to be strong to have the interview. I got ready, and like a bolt out of the blue my dream that i had had popped into my mind. Like a statue, i stared into the mirror as i recalled my dream. But was it a dream?
I remember visiting my nan. She was in the hospital. She wasnt as debilitated as i had seen her. She was alert and clear with her words, but remained to lay in the hospital bed. She said to me, "Love, i cant go on anymore,I can feel myself dying, Ive gotta go." I remember crying out "Nooooo, Noooo, Nooo." Then she said goodbye.
This explains why i woke as bright as a button. It also explains my morning sms to mum, and thinking wow as mentioned above.
Did Nan visit me in my dreams before she passed on? Or is it just a coincidence that she's been playing on my mind? Was there astral travelling????
I dont know. I'd like to think that she visited/I visited in my sleep.
She is at peace and at rest after long battle with cancer and dementia.
I did tackle the job interview. It went really well. I answered one question after i had done so much self study. At least i was prepared. I told the interviewer that my nan had just passed away, and i apologised if i seemed a little frazzled. She looked surprised, and said i should have called. All i could say is that i didnt want to miss this employment opportunity. She gave me condolences, and i thanked her for her time while i shook her hand.
She said that my cv was very impressive, that she was was impressed. That made me feel good. I was pleased with myself for being so strong. Maybe my nan was with me that morning? Maybe it was just me blocking it out until i got home.
All in all, im proud to have battled something i have strived for even though there was a death in the family. I find out via mail in approximately 2 weeks weather i have been accepted for the position. Fingers crossed. xxxxxx
